This is Mort Dork the Reporter, reporting!!! live! from somewhere on the planet...
This just in..Frosty the snowman is dead!!! yes, it became apparent today that Frosty's addiction to heat took a turn for the worse, when he was spotted purchasing 2 kerosene heaters at a Philadelphia Walmart. Witnesses to Frosty's rash behavior said he was waving his tree-arms around at customers and shouting, "This world is Cold, yo!" before tearing off his carrot nose and throwing it at an innocent poodle named Fluffystuffins, who he then battered with the carrot, before stomping out of the store. Poor Stuffins!!!!
Frosty, the lovable singing fat-bellied soprano of the famous Christmas song "Frosty the snowman" was found dead in his apartment by his landlord Hank, next to the kerosene heaters he purchased, with nothing left of him but a pile of slush...A note was found which read: "To my fans, the unbearable reality of my song only being played one season every year was too much, i love you, i will always be there with you when it snows....Deck the halls..."
RIP Frosty, we tip a forty to your beloved snowy memory!
Now on to more uplifting news, --Taliesin has informed me he will be releasing another installment of the Life of Taliesin very soon to YouTube, perhaps today, which will be titled...now get a load of this..."The Life of Taliesin -- episode 2" which is a HIGHLY original name, don't you think? i kid hahahahahaa. it's not the title, Taliesin fans, but the content therein that moves our hearts and has us wanting more. Tal also told me 'he will always remember Frosty with a warm affection'...no pun intended.
I asked Big Tal to give me a statement over the phone concerning his new release of wonders...his only words were "Live your dreams, y'all" which brought me to tears and had me dialing up my shrink after I hung up with Tal. I spoke with my shrink for 4 hours after that, crying and sipping beers and crying...the bill came to 230 dollars...I am broke, please send money now
Well just a short newscast today, homies...stay toasty, stay toasting, and be the toast of the town...or something. it's colder in Philly than a penguin's rump!!!
This is Mort, the Dork..signing off for now, stay tuned and...
Peace!!!
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
Saturday, December 7, 2013
"The Life of Taliesin, episode 2" due out this week!!
Right!!!! This is Mort Dork the Reporter reporting from...a secret location...wait hold up, i'm getting word now that Taliesin is about to...
Ok ok ok, listen!!!! if you didn't get Tal's album on itunes, do it now before Christmas!!!! by a copy of "The Rebirth of Leonidas" on itunes now and give it to your aunt Walanda, your cousin Herbie, or your little cousin Ezmeralda..the perfect digital stocking stuffer. ho ho ho it's Tal, in yo face, in yo stocking!!!!
Now on to other news... "The Life of Taliesin, Episode 2" is due to hit YouTube this week, a behind the scenes interview with Taliesin aka Big Tal that digs into his album and other such things that, well, quite frankly, talk about his life...duh!
The new video for his song "Ain't No Next Time," barring a zombie Apocalypse, a Martian invasion, a comet crashing and destroying the earth, is due for an official release the end of December...although this info keeps switching because Taliesin's camp will not give me an interview at the moment, since Tal is said to be in Dublin, Ireland doing a tour of writers' and poets' residencies, to get himself psyched for new lyrical displays of insane wordplay -- Is there a new song on the horizon? maybe!
Well, right!!!!! this has been a brief announcement, Taliesin fans, and in the words of Andre the Giant, 'stay tuned!'...the new year is bound to bring you new music from my main man!!....Wait!!!! this just in! an Ebola monkey has escaped The Philadelphia Zoo and is biting everyone on Broad St., but sources tell me that these monkeys are curing the people and not destroying them!!!!! so thank goodness!
This is Mort Dork signing off! stay tuned, stay crazy, stay in touch!!! right!!! happy holidays!!!
Mort!
Ok ok ok, listen!!!! if you didn't get Tal's album on itunes, do it now before Christmas!!!! by a copy of "The Rebirth of Leonidas" on itunes now and give it to your aunt Walanda, your cousin Herbie, or your little cousin Ezmeralda..the perfect digital stocking stuffer. ho ho ho it's Tal, in yo face, in yo stocking!!!!
Now on to other news... "The Life of Taliesin, Episode 2" is due to hit YouTube this week, a behind the scenes interview with Taliesin aka Big Tal that digs into his album and other such things that, well, quite frankly, talk about his life...duh!
The new video for his song "Ain't No Next Time," barring a zombie Apocalypse, a Martian invasion, a comet crashing and destroying the earth, is due for an official release the end of December...although this info keeps switching because Taliesin's camp will not give me an interview at the moment, since Tal is said to be in Dublin, Ireland doing a tour of writers' and poets' residencies, to get himself psyched for new lyrical displays of insane wordplay -- Is there a new song on the horizon? maybe!
Well, right!!!!! this has been a brief announcement, Taliesin fans, and in the words of Andre the Giant, 'stay tuned!'...the new year is bound to bring you new music from my main man!!....Wait!!!! this just in! an Ebola monkey has escaped The Philadelphia Zoo and is biting everyone on Broad St., but sources tell me that these monkeys are curing the people and not destroying them!!!!! so thank goodness!
This is Mort Dork signing off! stay tuned, stay crazy, stay in touch!!! right!!! happy holidays!!!
Mort!
Monday, October 21, 2013
Big Tal sighting on Main Street in Manayunk!!!!!
WELL...WELLWELLWELLWELLWELLWELLWELLWELLWELLWELLWELL!!!!!! THERE YOU ARE TALIESIN!!!
He's back with a brand new video on the way for his song "Ain't No Next Time," at least that's what he told me when I sat down with him at one of his favorite pubs in the city, Kildare's, last Saturday. My friend, the MC whose words resonate the universal codes and everlasting glory of the spheres, told me he recently finished shooting on the set of his new vid, which will hit YouTube in a couple of weeks. He also said he's been hard at work on a documentary entitled "the Life of Taliesin part 2", the second installment of the first part hahahahaha and also that he recently was interviewed by Jo Pincushion for her Pincushion Podcast show, which can be listened to here: http://www.jopincushion.com/pincushion-podcast-mini-episode-2-big-tal-rise-leonidas/#more-2493
I listened to my man Big Tal in this awesome interview, and the dude sounded like a cross between Plato, Shakespeare, and Sigmund Freud, mixed in with Einstein, and it was truly an excellent interview. He spoke of the Bluesy feel to his album, and the rawness of the lyrical quality on his album, and how much of a blessing it was to complete the album and give it to the people. He's quietly working on some new music, and also a designer brand of jeans called "Tal's denims" which he was wearing during my interview with him, but he told me the designer who he's working with, Pierre Nohair, from France, is a bit of a drama queen and that "the jean thing might fall through." I hope it doesn't fall through! These jeans Tal gave me fit my butt perfectly!!!!
It was great to see Tal and speak with him, as rumors were swirling that he'd disappeared off the map, joined a band of hip-hop pirates and sailed the Caribbean, or turned to a life of selling his CDs in the nude for good publicity, but he's assured me he's only been on his grind and doing his thing. He's been rocking out when he can (he recently joined up for live performances with his old bandmates, who currently rock under the alias "The Skyline Industry") seeing shows around the city when he can, and laying low at times. He told me one of the best shows he's seen in a while was Judah Priest's and Supreem's performances at the Grape Room a few weeks ago.
He also wanted me to tell everyone that he has a show coming up on Oct 26th at the Grape Room in Manayunk at 9pm and that everyone should come out for what is destined to be a great night of live music.
Anyway, as I sipped my Bud light and said goodbye to Taliesin at Kildare's, the man threw up a peace sign and said we'll talk more soon, and I could only leave there with a big smile on my face, thinking of all the great things to come in this new year for Mr. Taliesin.
Well, this is Mork, this is rap, this is life. Right!!!!! Signing off for now, peoples! Stay lovable!
He's back with a brand new video on the way for his song "Ain't No Next Time," at least that's what he told me when I sat down with him at one of his favorite pubs in the city, Kildare's, last Saturday. My friend, the MC whose words resonate the universal codes and everlasting glory of the spheres, told me he recently finished shooting on the set of his new vid, which will hit YouTube in a couple of weeks. He also said he's been hard at work on a documentary entitled "the Life of Taliesin part 2", the second installment of the first part hahahahaha and also that he recently was interviewed by Jo Pincushion for her Pincushion Podcast show, which can be listened to here: http://www.jopincushion.com/pincushion-podcast-mini-episode-2-big-tal-rise-leonidas/#more-2493
I listened to my man Big Tal in this awesome interview, and the dude sounded like a cross between Plato, Shakespeare, and Sigmund Freud, mixed in with Einstein, and it was truly an excellent interview. He spoke of the Bluesy feel to his album, and the rawness of the lyrical quality on his album, and how much of a blessing it was to complete the album and give it to the people. He's quietly working on some new music, and also a designer brand of jeans called "Tal's denims" which he was wearing during my interview with him, but he told me the designer who he's working with, Pierre Nohair, from France, is a bit of a drama queen and that "the jean thing might fall through." I hope it doesn't fall through! These jeans Tal gave me fit my butt perfectly!!!!
It was great to see Tal and speak with him, as rumors were swirling that he'd disappeared off the map, joined a band of hip-hop pirates and sailed the Caribbean, or turned to a life of selling his CDs in the nude for good publicity, but he's assured me he's only been on his grind and doing his thing. He's been rocking out when he can (he recently joined up for live performances with his old bandmates, who currently rock under the alias "The Skyline Industry") seeing shows around the city when he can, and laying low at times. He told me one of the best shows he's seen in a while was Judah Priest's and Supreem's performances at the Grape Room a few weeks ago.
He also wanted me to tell everyone that he has a show coming up on Oct 26th at the Grape Room in Manayunk at 9pm and that everyone should come out for what is destined to be a great night of live music.
Anyway, as I sipped my Bud light and said goodbye to Taliesin at Kildare's, the man threw up a peace sign and said we'll talk more soon, and I could only leave there with a big smile on my face, thinking of all the great things to come in this new year for Mr. Taliesin.
Well, this is Mork, this is rap, this is life. Right!!!!! Signing off for now, peoples! Stay lovable!
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Taliesin's album "The Rebirth of Leonidas" getting rave reviews, Tal's album release party, and an old lady calls Tal's album the best she's heard since Sinatra
This is Mort Dork signing in from Philly, somewhere out there, beyond the high-rises and the factory smoke. I attended Taliesin's album release party on the 27th, incognito -- i was hiding in the wall paneling at Murphy's and i can tell you that the show was all that and a bag of walnuts.... many people danced the night away and held hands at the end of the night. also, since the release and listening to Tal's album over and over again, i can say that it has staying power and i would even be able to play it for my grandmother who loves all music because it tells a story -- the story of one rapper rhyming about his life and...well, thats what its about...Right!!!!
Anyway, i have been asking people in the city about Tal's album and because i was on a budget i could only do one interview, which i did with North Philly native Erma, who said that the last album she like'd as much as the Rebirth of Leonidas was "Frank Sinatra's album...pick one."
I also caught up with Taliesin who said he has a new video in the works, and also some new music but it was on the hush hush. He also said he wanted to thank everyone who came out to celebrate his CD release, and give a big shout to those who played in his band and contributed to a great evening...Cruzie Cruz, Casket Crew, Daniel Wright, Matt Fischer, Wes Werner, Brian Mazzarini and Nefew...Also a special shout to Dj Xklusive and Dj Dro, Matt Gummel and Jeff Denshock...
Those were his words, these are mine...and the theme here is 'buy Taliesin's album' "The Rebirth of Leonidas" now on Itunes because he has a way with words...word.
This is Mort, this is life, this is me...
Goodbye and peace out
Anyway, i have been asking people in the city about Tal's album and because i was on a budget i could only do one interview, which i did with North Philly native Erma, who said that the last album she like'd as much as the Rebirth of Leonidas was "Frank Sinatra's album...pick one."
I also caught up with Taliesin who said he has a new video in the works, and also some new music but it was on the hush hush. He also said he wanted to thank everyone who came out to celebrate his CD release, and give a big shout to those who played in his band and contributed to a great evening...Cruzie Cruz, Casket Crew, Daniel Wright, Matt Fischer, Wes Werner, Brian Mazzarini and Nefew...Also a special shout to Dj Xklusive and Dj Dro, Matt Gummel and Jeff Denshock...
Those were his words, these are mine...and the theme here is 'buy Taliesin's album' "The Rebirth of Leonidas" now on Itunes because he has a way with words...word.
This is Mort, this is life, this is me...
Goodbye and peace out
Thursday, July 18, 2013
Taliesin get more likes than Oprah on Shot97.com!!!!
This is Mort Dork the Reporter reporting live that it is indeed official: rapper Taliesin has more likes than Oprah on Shot97.com for his video "Roll out tha Carpet," which features rhyming peer Nefew...!
Get ready rap world, this guy they call Big Tal is going to host is own show soon and interview famous people like the Pope and the Backstreet Boys and Willie Nelson!
Taliesin's album "The Rebirth of Leonidas" drops on iTunes on July 27th so get your copy!
This is Mort, this is news, this is life!
goodbye, for now, and all praise Taliesin for defeating Oprah, my old hero.
peace!
Get ready rap world, this guy they call Big Tal is going to host is own show soon and interview famous people like the Pope and the Backstreet Boys and Willie Nelson!
Taliesin's album "The Rebirth of Leonidas" drops on iTunes on July 27th so get your copy!
This is Mort, this is news, this is life!
goodbye, for now, and all praise Taliesin for defeating Oprah, my old hero.
peace!
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
OLD LADY NEARLY RUN OVER WHILE TELLING NEWSMAN TALIESIN'S "THE REBIRTH OF LEONIDAS" IS A CLASSIC!
This is Mort Dork the Reporter signing in from Broad St., down by The Eagles' stadium and all the other stadiums...RIGHT!!!! This just in, 87 year old Dahel Widyu of Kensington, Philadelphia (hip-hop enthusiast and ex-backup vocalist for The Corner-Dive Heroes) was nearly run over today while passing out flyers for Taliesin's album release party (which will be held at Murphy's in Levittown, PA on July 27th!), clipped by a Cadillac on Broad St.while telling newsman Hank Hugabee that Taliesin's new album "The Rebirth of Leonidas" is a classic. "THAT WAS A CLOSE LITTLE CALL WE HAD, WASN'T IT????" Dahel said to me, with a wide-eyed pshycotic look... "YA FOUR-EYED BASTARD!"
Now I can't blame Mrs. Widyu for singing the praises of Taliesin's historic release...I've listened on repeat now for 787 times...a gorgeous serving of lyrical fluidity and live instruments that will have music purists and hip-hop heads alike nodding in agreement that Big Tal is the dookie - harder than some white dog poop, sun-dried and baked on a sizzling city sidewalk. But I will say this, to the people of Philadelphia and the world, we are all going to die, so it would have been better if....wait! this just in!!!!! A PTERODACTYL IS HEADED FOR THE CITY CENTER AND IS SWEEPING UP PEOPLE BY THE DOZENS!!!!!!! STAY IN YOUR HOMES, WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!"
GET TALIESIN'S NEW ALBUM "THE REBIRTH OF LEONIDAS" ON JULY 27TH, AND BE AT MURPHY'S BAR IN LEVITTOWN, PA, ON THE 27TH OF JULY TOO!!!! DOORS OPEN AT 7:30PM, $10 DOLLAR ADMISSION, WHICH INCLUDES A COPY OF HIS NEW CD, A DESTINED CLASSIC!!!!!
THIS IS MORT DORK THE REPORTER\, SIGNING OFF!!!!!
Now I can't blame Mrs. Widyu for singing the praises of Taliesin's historic release...I've listened on repeat now for 787 times...a gorgeous serving of lyrical fluidity and live instruments that will have music purists and hip-hop heads alike nodding in agreement that Big Tal is the dookie - harder than some white dog poop, sun-dried and baked on a sizzling city sidewalk. But I will say this, to the people of Philadelphia and the world, we are all going to die, so it would have been better if....wait! this just in!!!!! A PTERODACTYL IS HEADED FOR THE CITY CENTER AND IS SWEEPING UP PEOPLE BY THE DOZENS!!!!!!! STAY IN YOUR HOMES, WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!"
GET TALIESIN'S NEW ALBUM "THE REBIRTH OF LEONIDAS" ON JULY 27TH, AND BE AT MURPHY'S BAR IN LEVITTOWN, PA, ON THE 27TH OF JULY TOO!!!! DOORS OPEN AT 7:30PM, $10 DOLLAR ADMISSION, WHICH INCLUDES A COPY OF HIS NEW CD, A DESTINED CLASSIC!!!!!
THIS IS MORT DORK THE REPORTER\, SIGNING OFF!!!!!
Sunday, June 30, 2013
Taliesin accused of trying to start a zombie apocalypse because of his song "Mayan Calendar Syndrome"!!!!
This is Mort Dork reporting LIVE!!!!!! right...ok well this just in...Taliesin, my boy, my dog, my brother from another mother, has been accused of trying to start a musical Doomsday. A certain political figure..we wont name names.. said this "although Mayan Calendar Syndrome's lyrics are intelligent, poetic spears which throw themselves directly at the heart of the walking dead-like populous, we have reason to believe they might actually cause a zombie apocalypse and will seek to ban Taliesin's CD -- which caused my 5 year old daughter to cry because she thought a zombie was in her closet. Big Tal is a menace to society!"
Slanders!!!!!!!! what does this white-collar jerk think? that we are all stupid????? right!!!! I have listened to Taliesin's CD "The Rebirth of Leonidas" 245 times..no wait, 446 times, and i have yet to see one zombie, corpse, or green-skinned brain-eater on the streets of Philly - plenty of crackheads however... In fact, I will go as far as to say this CD may wake the music-buying masses from the dead and coax them to buy their copy of Tal's CD (on iTunes and most digital stores July 27th PLUG PLUG PLUG) and add freshness to the world of music...if anything it could bring the dead back to life and have people listening to a music one would call "REAL"
Let's pause for ten minutes of silence, for 99,900,000 MCs who just choked on their Don P. And thats all for now!!!! BE at Taliesin's album release party at Murphy's in Levittown PA on July 27th at 730 pm!~!!! i'll be there. 10 dollars at the door which includes a copy of his CD "The Rebirth of Leonidas"!!!! be there or be...right! i'm out of here! I'll check back soon! Mort Dork signing off!
Slanders!!!!!!!! what does this white-collar jerk think? that we are all stupid????? right!!!! I have listened to Taliesin's CD "The Rebirth of Leonidas" 245 times..no wait, 446 times, and i have yet to see one zombie, corpse, or green-skinned brain-eater on the streets of Philly - plenty of crackheads however... In fact, I will go as far as to say this CD may wake the music-buying masses from the dead and coax them to buy their copy of Tal's CD (on iTunes and most digital stores July 27th PLUG PLUG PLUG) and add freshness to the world of music...if anything it could bring the dead back to life and have people listening to a music one would call "REAL"
Let's pause for ten minutes of silence, for 99,900,000 MCs who just choked on their Don P. And thats all for now!!!! BE at Taliesin's album release party at Murphy's in Levittown PA on July 27th at 730 pm!~!!! i'll be there. 10 dollars at the door which includes a copy of his CD "The Rebirth of Leonidas"!!!! be there or be...right! i'm out of here! I'll check back soon! Mort Dork signing off!
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